Life-changing letters

RECENTLY, I was about to take two octogenarian friends to the airport. The husband was taking a long time to come to the car as he stopped to open the mailbox and slowly fish around in it. His wife called to him to hurry up, then said to me, “Saturday, Sunday, everyday! He is always checking the mailbox as if it has letters in it…and he doesn’t even write letters!”

As he came to the car with the only mail that day – a religious booklet – the thought occurred to me that I would write a letter to him and send it through the post, so he could have the pleasure of receiving and opening mail that is not a bill or pamphlet.

Perhaps, pretty much like writing these articles, I could sit somewhere, sip some coffee and just start to express what emerges. What may seem mundane as a written topic may have deeper meaning and significance to the one who eventually reads it, even if just because that person’s life is touched and transformed at that moment through the enjoyment of having received something deemed special.

In my thoughts onwriting that letter, I considered the likelihood that he might want to respond – maybe not to me, as I live "right there" in Tobago...but if someone from afar had written to him, he might be more inclined to reciprocate, thereby potentially forming a pen-pal friendship, if that was something he found enjoyable.

It occurred to me that letter-writing might be a fun and productive way in which elderly people in homes or long-term hospital patients could pass their time. Receiving a letter, especially from a complete stranger, could possibly make a hospital patient feel a lot better, via a sense of being thought of, remembered or encouraged through positive words and sentiments.

There are various prison pen-pal programmes, rehabilitative in nature, through which members of the public can communicate with the incarcerated. Prisoners are isolated and disconnected from the outside world and these pen-pal initiatives enable them to practise social interaction, diminish loneliness, benefit mental health and boost emotional well-being.

Sometimes, through the prison pen-pal network, romance results between the incarcerated and free individuals, and these "couples" look forward to being united at the end of the prison sentence. There is a reality television show along those lines, but the name does not come to mind right now.

What does come to mind, however, is a German friend who, on one visit to Tobago, rescued an injured skeletal dog (whom she named Ginger) from the rainforest, paid for her to be treated and handed her over to the shelter. As Ginger remained unadopted for three years, she had Ginger flown to Germany, where she has been living happily for the past few years.

As the owner of a home for the elderly, our friend would take Ginger to work daily. In what one can refer to as "animal-assisted therapy," Ginger played an important role in the lives of the aged patients. They would play with her, stroke her, fall asleep hugging her. Those with Alzheimer’s seemed to have their memories stimulated through interaction with the dog – as she transported them back to a time in their lives when they had pets they loved. This mental and emotional stimulation was excellent for boosting moods and spirits.

It occurs to me that letter-writing to those with Alzheimer’s may have a similar effect. Most, if not all, of those who currently suffer with dementia are from a time when "snail mail" was popular. Receiving an envelope, having to open it, reading (or being read to) the words of the card or letter within…these seemingly simple things can probably touch the heartstrings and memory channels of most, igniting feelings and recalling experiences and relationships of yore, while reminding them that they are still important and not forgotten.

Additionally, whereas someone with dementia might forget a conversation from one minute to the next, the letter or card is something he/she can rediscover as often as they see it, each time feeling that it is something new and exciting.

In simple or profound ways, basic letter writing can be life-changing. Perhaps we can all take the time to write a letter to someone today…a stranger who may have more need of it than we know.