The first week of secondary school

Dr Asha Pemberton

teenhealth.tt@gmail.com

THEY made it! A cohort young people of our islands have completed their first week of secondary school. Perhaps the first major transition of their childhood, this moment marks movement into a very different social and academic space at a time when the emergence of adolescence is occurring. It is a moment during which parental guidance and support are absolutely required to assist tweens in managing their own emotions and expectations while adjusting to the new set of requirements before them.

Young people entering their first form of secondary school will invariably be in a range of stages of puberty. Since it is normal for healthy girls at or around age nine to begin to demonstrate the signs of puberty, certainly by 11 several will be in more advanced stages. Parents are encouraged to discuss pubertal changes with children well before the onset of this process.

If, for whatever reason this has not happened, starting secondary school is a good opportunity to have these conversations. Young people need to understand personal hygiene, skincare, as well as menstrual health to ensure that they navigate their own bodily changes while being appropriate and sensitive to others around them.

It is unfortunate that many tweens remain poorly educated about puberty and as a result fall victim to online disinformation, ridicule or even bulling. Equally, for those tweens who enter puberty at later ages, parents should anticipate feelings of self-consciousness or shame and be prepared to support them through this process.

The secondary school environment gradually builds on the expectation that young people become more organised and self-sufficient. While helicoptering parents sometimes have intimate access to their children’s teachers during the primary school years, this will and should change.

Tweens need to be taught specific organisational skills to ensure their smooth and independent progress through this new educational space. Timetables, routines and structure are foundational tools. At this time, they will have a larger load of subjects, be exposed to several different teachers and teaching styles, and are required to manage them all. It is a process.

Parental expectations also have to be managed so that undue pressure is not placed during the first weeks, as they can lead to feelings of overwhelm and anxiety.

Social adjustment is perhaps the most significant change experienced by the young people. Some are fortunate to enter secondary schools with a group of friends. This support can serve as a protective layer for their delicate egos as they face a much larger and more diverse group of peers. Others, however, are forced to navigate a new school alone. In either context there is no guarantee of the social assimilation that will occur.

It is not uncommon for groups of primary school friends to quickly disband as new connections are made. This can leave some young people feeling literally broken-hearted and distressed.

Some young people naturally engage with others more easily and are excited to explore new and diverse friendships. Others become anxious and prefer to remain with the familiar. They tend to retreat inward in new spaces. In all contexts, parents need to remain engaged and keep a watchful eye.

It is natural for some friendships to evolve over time and young people should not hinge their self-esteem only on relationships. A good strategy that should be used from the beginning of secondary school life is to connect with extracurricular and school-based activities. This allows young people to not only learn a skill, sport or leadership quality, but to create a space for relationships with new peers of similar mindset.

During adolescence, friendships are notoriously fragile and fickle. In other to bolster the self-confidence of tweens and teens, connections of a wide range are important. As they navigate the change of being the oldest in school, to the youngest and least exposed, safe engagement in sport, music, cultural or leadership groups provides an important opportunity for them to grow and thrive as they take this next important step in their overall development.