Don’t push your agendas on children

The children at the St Jude’s Home for Girls, Belmont and environs rushed to take photos with Trini-born hip hop star Nicki Minaj (Onika Maraj-Petty) when she visited the institution last Thursday – something that is pretty much a given with children and young people. Minaj planted herself amid the crowd of youngsters, gave her signature pouty-lips look and posed for photos from various angles. The children could not have been more thrilled.

I don’t know if anyone else saw it, but the looks on their faces matched the look of the face of the little girl on a music truck, smiling widely for the camera, with Prime Minister Dr Keith Rowley standing on the road behind her. A photo, the girl’s mother explained, the child had asked her mother to take when she saw the prime minister. Because, to some children, prime ministers and presidents are celebrities within their own rights.

It is unfortunate that such a happy image was used by radio talk show host Barrington “Skippy” Thomas as a political tool. The girl’s mother lamented that her child was made a “national spectacle” when Thomas’ posted the photo on his Facebook page stating that he found the image “uncomfortable.” The post was subsequently removed, but not before it was screenshotted and shared widely on social media. The damage was already done.

Thomas’s response to the mother’s request that the photo be taken down, “Keep her home not in the public flirting for adult men,” had placed a black mark over her innocence and sullied the reputation of the prime minister in the minds of some people. No subsequent explanations by Thomas that his message was taken out of context, nor his suspension from the radio station could take away from the fact.

I recall a few years ago I was invited to President’s House to interview Reema Carmona, wife of then president Anthony Carmona. My son was really impressed and recorded a greeting on his iPad to send to her. Never mind she never saw it because of the security protocol that prohibited me from taking a recording device into the interview room. The point is, although he did not know her as a person, in his eyes she was a celebrity by virtue of her affiliation with the president’s office. But that aside, I also ensured that he understood even if he doesn’t feel that great about someone as a person, it is imperative that he respects their office.

“I will honour (show respect for) my parents, my leaders, my teachers, and my elders and those in authority,” are words that I’ve never taken lightly, and I’ve taught him the same. And that standing up for what he believes doesn’t have to mean disrespecting someone. That he can disagree with anyone, no matter how low or high their office, in a respectful manner. A lesson that I wish Thomas and many others with political agendas will learn.

I’ve always found politics to be very divisive and devoid of respect, sometimes making some people sink to unimaginable nasty levels to make a point. And people who go even lower and use children as props in their political games are nothing more than political bullies. These people are even more dangerous when they are in influential positions.

“We also know much about the powers of observational learning. When children observe a person who models, or exhibits, certain speech or behaviour – particularly when that person appears to be a powerful and influential adult – children will learn without being directly rewarded. The speech or behaviour will enter their repertoire and be available for use later. We also know that the same observations repeated over time will deepen such learning. Thus, when bullying language, or other hate speech is “normalised” by adults in the media, it becomes part of the social landscape of a child’s world,” an article in psychologytoday.com says.

As a talk show host, Thomas had a responsibility to do better, no matter how he feels about the prime minister as a person. And dragging an innocent child into it was way more than just crossing the line. The nation’s children are looking and listening.

But we don’t even have to go as far as that. We can’t escape politics and political passion can sometimes prompt adults in the home to say the darnedest things and act in the strangest of ways. And because children are wont to mimic what they see and hear at home, it can be expected that these very political discussions and behaviours will eventually find their way into the classrooms, onto the playgrounds, into birthday parties, in the swimming pools. As parents we need to be mindful that as deep-rooted as our political alliances are, our children are individuals with minds of their own. It’s never too early to begin teaching them about politics because it involves almost everything we do in life.

My son always has so many questions about politics, especially around election time. I believe answering his questions about how local and central government works helps keep him better informed, which will be of benefit to him and the country when the time comes for him to perform his civic duty. It also helps to make him more aware of social responsibility and to develop his own opinions.

Politics, like religion, should be an individual thing and our children ought to be given their own voice. Teach them about it, but please don’t push your own agendas.