Can I have a hug?

Kanisa George

A LARGE PART of who we are has a lot to do with our emotions. Ignore them, sweep them under the carpet, or confront them head-on; no matter how we deal with them, we remain scared by the permeable effect of their reach.

As much as some of us try to understand our emotional state, we become so quickly bombarded by the exigencies of our daily lives that comprehension is so far removed from our reality. In truth, some of us don't know how to satisfy our emotional needs.

All the rave on social media recently has been videos by mental health experts which seek to demystify our relationship with the human touch. More specifically, the importance of hugging.

Being a hugger myself, I wasn't at all surprised by the mountain of research available that highlighted not only the emotional benefits of hugging, but the health and wellness components as well. What did cause confusion, however, was the multitude of comments that suggest most people didn't see the need to express emotions physically.

Adding insult to injury, several social-media users admitted to feeling uncomfortable when hugging, not just in social settings, but even in their most intimate relationships.

It might be a strange concept for some people, but hugging is a universally recognised sign of acceptance. To some experts, a hug can symbolise feelings of empathy, trust, and even selflessness.

Believed to have originated in Europe during the Middle Ages, hugging was initially used to demonstrate trust between two individuals who wanted to form an alliance or forge a partnership. Since then, it has taken on a new realm and is mainly used to express affection and show your connection to another. Importantly, it sends a message that you value your relationship with another.

Although it is seen as a universal symbol of affection across cultures, in some African and Asian cultures it is not a common practice. Funny enough, even in cultures where hugging forms part of normative behaviour, people sometimes shy away from engaging in the act altogether. Some people genuinely question why hugging is such a big deal.

Extending your arms while allowing your body to collide with another might not seem like such a big thing, but study after study suggests that hugging may make you less likely to get ill. In a 2015 study, researchers from Carnegie Mellon University looked at the effects that hugs and other forms of affection can have on the immune system.

Specifically, researchers were determined to uncover whether people who felt loved were less susceptible to the common cold. Astonishingly, the research discovered that not only were they less sensitive, but that 32 per cent of that immune boost came from the stress-alleviating effects of hugging. In summary, those who received more hugs were more protected from infection.

The benefits of hugging go far beyond the warm feeling that comes from an embrace. Not only can hugs help reduce fear, stress and pain, but other studies found that they may also support immune and cardiovascular health.

Researchers found that the parts of a woman's brain associated with stress showed reduced activity when they hugged someone. This isn't the only benefit we receive from hugs and research shows that hugs can lead to feelings of happiness. When we hug or even sit next to someone, the cuddle hormone or oxytocin is activated, and this is associated with less stress.

Interestingly, scientists have found that this hormone has a strong effect on women. One study found that the positive benefits of oxytocin were strongest in women who had better relationships and more frequent hugs with their romantic partners. It even found that women also saw positive effects of oxytocin when they held their infants closely.

So, there you have it. Hugs deserve far more credit than most people are willing to give, and this might have a lot to do with the fact that we live in a world with a vast amount of anti-huggers. Some people want to dish out hugs, while others simply detest it. Why might that be?

According to experts, it may have something to do with how you were raised. Suzanne Degges-White, Professor of Counselling and Counsellor Education at Northern Illinois University, believes that our tendency to engage in physical touch – whether hugging or linking arms with a friend – is often a product of our early childhood experience.

A 2012 study published in Comprehensive Psychology found that people raised by parents who were frequent huggers were more likely to be huggers in adulthood. Conversely, for people raised by devout non-huggers, the very thought of hugging might make them uncomfortable. Of course, it's possible that growing up without physical affection could have the opposite effect, and research also shows that other variables like self-esteem and body issues might also play a massive role in making one hug-avoidant.

No matter how you may feel about it, the research is clear: huge benefits are derived from hugging. Whether it's falling prey to your vulnerabilities or making someone feel loved, it may be time we all become more open to the concept of hugging.