Counselling, medicals vital before marriage

THE EDITOR: Open letter to the Minister of Legal Affairs.

Many countries around the world have mandated medical examination and premarital counselling as prerequisites for wedlock.

In TT, innumerable high school attachments often blossom into strong romantic relationships. When this occurs and marriage gets on the cards, irrespective of how healthy, passionate or warm such relationships have been, professional counselling should be sought and in each situation precede the taking of the sacred vows.

Quite a number of couples opt for a short courtship period while other couples go for an extended “getting to know each other" period of two years and over. This phase of intended romance is crucial as there are guys among us who are quite handsome and intelligent, fine-mannered with plain, clear and proper diction, but under their belts are criminal matters pending in various courts across the country.

The dawn of the internet services has brought with it a new measure of hope, a new beginning for widows, widowers and divorcees who thankfully would be sharing a common sentiment: “love is lovelier the second time around.” The transforming of lonesome and isolated lives into lives packed with fun and laughter are among the myriads of benefits emanating from technological evolution.

Currently there is an influx of settlers from another jurisdiction here on our shores and they all seem happy, jubilant and fun-loving. In the event of any of them falling in love and desirous of joining hands with any of our nationals, the only additional requirement should be a good character certificate accessible from their Departmento de Policia and authenticated by our Attorney General and Minister of Legal Affairs.

Medical examination with results to be made known to each other and premarital counselling should also precede the taking of the marriage vows.

Conflict in relationships may arise from time to time and in my layman’s view this usually occurs when one partner visualises that his/her needs are not being met. Conflict may also arise in marriages of people of different ethnicity and denomination.

The drama unfolds on the occasion of the christening of the product of such unions. Dad is adamant in his desire for his child to be christened in his faith, the faith of his parents and grandparents, while mom is also unshaken in her stance as she may be a Christian and cannot picture her child being christened in another faith.

Men’s attempt at interpreting or apprehending certain behaviours or utterances of their spouses can often be described as an action in futility which often leads to discord and arguments. For a peaceful, harmonious and fun-filled relationship, husbands and adult males should lend credence to the quotation of Oscar Wilde, “Women were meant to be loved and not understood."

DAVID O'NEIL

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