Dangerous messages behind that slap

PAOLO KERNAHAN

JUST IMAGINE, for a moment, that you slapped someone in the face in a mall parking lot because they offended you.

Do you think you'd just be able to walk away without repercussions?

Yes, the Will Smith-Chris Rock debacle is over-chewed gum by now. You've likely had it up to here with the analysis and celebrity weigh-ins.

Honestly, the fact that a slap could outbid an ongoing war for international coverage is disheartening. So I was in two minds about adding my two cents.

However, there's a critical angle to this saga that's escaped pop culture pundits – the reality of the Hollywood megastar vs that of you, ordinary Eddie Punchclock. You see, it's the messaging from that seismic slap that carries the most weight and lessons.

Signals telegraphed through Will Smith's actions and the resulting shock waves are underappreciated for the harm they can cause. Here's one of them: responding to offensive words with physical violence is "only human.” These things happen.

Endorsements from those who championed Smith as chivalrous were particularly surprising. This is a dangerous notion because slights can be subjective, influenced by personality, upbringing, temperament, etc. There's nothing more human than taking offence where there's none.

Violence, alternatively, is unambiguous and absolute in its expression and effects. One blow landed in the heat of the moment can unleash consequences that may echo across time. Physical retaliation should always be the option of last resort, ideally in self-defence situations.

Many people who aren't Will Smith seem to think a pistols-at-dawn approach to conflict resolution will produce the same outcomes for them. Not all humans are equal, though. If you or I, mere mortals that we are, threw hands to counter injurious words, the fallout would be dramatically different.

You can be sure if you gave the offending party a fresh one, you wouldn't be allowed to swagger back to your velvet seat and bask in a momentous evening. No. Civilian, you would be bounced off the sidewalk on your chin, arrested and fined and/or jailed.

That night was a maelstrom of toxic messaging and bewildering optics. Smith sat in the front row post-slap carrying on as if nothing happened. Indeed, he appeared to be enjoying himself immensely.

Meanwhile, Chris Rock was left to soldier on, albeit with a nonplussed look contorting his face. These images were streamed into our homes and minds; action without consequence. Norms of acceptable behaviour turned inside out.

When Smith eventually took the stage, he compounded the assault. “Love makes you do crazy things” was perhaps the most breathtaking line of the evening.

Love is often invoked as a justification for domestic violence, a scourge with which Smith is, regrettably, familiar. Additionally, by mentioning the intercession of the “devil,” he shifted accountability to some unseen influence.

The message to the audience was this: That wasn't me back there. That was the work of something, or someone else.

That night did nothing for the empowerment of women, either. The idea of a man defending the honour of a fragile maiden seems like a throwback to a bygone era. What of our conflicted young men? How did they digest Smith's actions in the context of asserting themselves in a complex world of machismo, identity politics and gender relations?

We need look no further than the tweet from Smith's son Jaden for guidance, “That's how we do it.”

Will Smith's career will likely recover from this grave incident. He'll probably lay low for a while then make the obligatory announcement of signing up for therapy in the typical big sit-down interview.

Indeed, no one should be cancelled for one mistake. Consequences yes, but redemption should always be on the table (not the red table, though).

For the rest of us who don't reside on Mount Olympus, discretion is the better part of valour. We must choose our actions carefully because we will be judged disproportionately to those we admire from below. Our path to redemption will not be the same as that of Will Smith. Without vast financial resources and a fawning fan base, the harm to our reputation, career and personal life could be irreparable.

The key insight from the Smith-Rock affair is that as ordinary folk we must weigh the consequences of actions before taking them. Oprah won't be calling to hear “our truth.”