Grief in time ofcovid19

THE EDITOR: I recently “attended” the funeral tribute service of a co-worker via YouTube. I felt bereft and unfulfilled, but I can only imagine the feeling of her family and all those people who have lost family members during this trying time of covid19.

Watching her family – husband, two daughters and her sister – and the priest, five solitary souls at a service to commemorate the life of their loved one was nothing short of heartbreaking.

All my coworkers were tuned in and we were WhatsApping each other saying how difficult it was and how we were moved and sad and yet so disconnected at the same time.

It’s like your mind is trying to reconcile with itself as to how exactly you are supposed to deal with this – confusion, disbelief, numbness, profound sadness or a combination of all.

I think the most disconcerting thing about the event was how deprived one felt about the inability to grieve together, in proximity, to commiserate with the family and with others physically.

With touch there is solace that transcends the spoken word.

A squeeze of the hand, a touch on the shoulder, a kiss on the cheek, a pat on the back, a hug. All simple gestures but ones that speak volumes that could not be conveyed by all the information in a full encyclopedia set. I believe that is the hardest part to reconcile with this event.

After the service, someone asked me what it was like and the only way I could describe it other than extremely sad and moving was surreal, clinical and antiseptic.

My heart goes out to all of those families and friends who have to endure this experience during these trying times. My sympathy and deepest condolences go out to all who are mourning.

I get it. I really do.

Cherish the moments you have when you have them. There is no substitute.

L BOISSELLE

Diego Martin