Ian’s last 24 hours

CPL Ian Hamilton, 36, the police band member, musician and calypsonian who is believed to have taken his own life on Sunday, once questioned in song what people would do if they knew they only had 24 hours to live.

In his song Yuh Last 24 Hours he wrote: “Now days done battered/Thought pattern scattered/How would you your last hours prioritise?

“Would you spend it drinking or in sober thinking?/Would you act in desperation or be wise?”

In Hamilton’s last hours alive, he did what he loved – performing alongside his bandmates at a charity event at the Police Administration Building in Port of Spain.

He also spent some of his last moments sending messages to his siblings, loved ones and people close to him, apologising for any wrongs he might have done, and asking them for forgiveness.

Relatives told Newsday he sent the messages to two of his four sisters and the mother of his child, saying he was sorry for hurting them in any way and apologised for any misunderstandings.

“It seemed like he was making peace” said one of Hamilton’s relatives on Tuesday.

Hamilton was found in the bathroom of the police band’s dormitory on Sunday morning at about 7.30. A fellow bandmember told police he last saw Hamilton alive at about 11.30 pm on Saturday.

Around 7.10 the next morning, he was awakened by the sound of water running in the bathroom, and shortly afterwards he found Hamilton’s body.

At the Forensic Science Centre in St James an autopsy confirmed Hamilton died from hanging.

Relatives told Newsday that while Hamilton was a loving and helpful man, he would often keep his problems to himself and would not seek any help.

“He would reach out and give all he could give. He was always there for me. Any situation that I faced, I knew I could depend on him. He would always reach out and make time for me.” said one.

His family also told Newsday his love for music was honed while he grew up at the St Mary’s Home for Children. When he and his three eldest siblings were very young, their mother frequently left them at home to fend for themselves. Neighbours eventually called social services, and they were taken to the home.

While there Hamilton began learning music, and loved it so much he began learning to play the trombone. When he got older and left the home, he pursued his love for music and when he joined the police 15 years ago, he also joined the band.

Recently he had been struggling with depression. Newsday was told that since the death of his fiancee, Natasha Jenny Edmund, a year ago, loved ones, relatives and colleagues said he was never the same. He became withdrawn and would frequently be seen with tears streaming down his face.

In a letter found close to his body, he said the death of his fiancee was too much to bear, and cited the pain of his loss, along with mounting debt, as reasons for taking his own life.

PC’s Hamilton’s funeral will take place today at the St Mary’s Anglican Church, Tacarigua.